If you've been following me for awhile now, you know that I'm all about supporting other boss babes that are doing incredible work in the coaching world. Today, I wanted to feature an article written by Tess Rafferty-a self declared self-love activator and self-doubt challenger! She's written some important reflections on why her unique life experiences and her training have positioned her to show up in the world for a select group of clients, and the beauty in not appealing to everyone. Tess is a coach and like many of us, doesn't feel "perfect" all of the time. Coaching isn't about being perfect and having it all together though, it's about being honest, being real and holding space for all of our clients to do the same. If you've ever felt stuck because you "don't have it all together" or "aren't for everyone" this is a must read. You can learn more about Tess by visiting her website here.

 

I'm Done Pretending

Even if you're not as immersed in the coaching world as I am, you've probably noticed that it's full of people (mostly women) presenting glossy versions of themselves and their lives, and formulas "proven" to "fix" you and yours. Honestly, in this world full of #omgoddess and sparkly unicorns sometimes I feel like a black sheep. Or a wolf in sheep's clothing. I'm probably mixing up my metaphors but the point is, I feel like a fraud. Like who am I to help people with their lives when mine isn't perfect? When I still battle with self-doubt, have days when I'm frustrated to the point of tears by my OCD, and nights when I drink too much wine.



The fact is that not only am I qualified to be a coach because of my training, but BECAUSE of my struggles and imperfections. Because of how far I've come, and how far I still have to go. Because I'm 100% confident in this work that has changed my life and helped me grow, and because I know if I don't share the gift of what I've learned with others I'm doing a disservice to the world and I'll never feel like I'm truly fulfilling my purpose.

I've always been drawn to people who are real, and loved them even more for their flaws. So it makes sense that I've been drawn to coaches that don't pretend their lives are all shiny and neat. And these coaches, these wise, beautiful, imperfect women, have changed my life. Have held me when I cried. Have experienced genuine joy when I've had a breakthrough. Have stood with me through the brightest days and the darkest nights. In my life, these women have seemed heaven-sent, so from now on when I'm being particularly hard on myself (which to be honest, is more often than I'd like), I'm going to try to hold myself to their standards instead of some unrealistic and frankly dangerous standard of perfection.

So who am I?

I'm a coach. I’m human. I’m flawed. I’m messy. I’m traditional. I’m forward-thinking. I’m a grateful daughter. I’m a loyal friend. I’m a dog mom. I’m way too hard on myself. I’m a dreamer. I’m adventurous. I’m anxious. I’m a friend to animals. I’m {mostly} a vegan. I’m childlike. I’m an old soul. I’m a lot, though I often feel like I’m not enough. I’m caring. I’m an empath. I feel SO much. Sometimes I try to escape. Sometimes I run away. Sometimes I stand my ground. I’m brave. I’m obsessive. I’m forgetful. I’m hilarious. I’m forgiving. I’m trusting. I’m careful. Sometimes I’m careless. I’ve always known I’m meant to do great things. I am doing great things.

I'm here to be MY clients' ideal coach - I know I'm never going to appeal to everyone, and that's more than ok. My people are the weird ones, the wild ones, the over-thinkers, the dreamers who are struggling but refuse to accept that "this is all there is." Connecting with these amazing souls is what lights me up, so I refuse to put up a fake sparkly wall that's going to keep us all in the dark and keep the REAL magic from happening.

If you'd like to find out more about how coaching can help you get reconnected with your most authentic self, click here to schedule a free call with me. And remember, what the world needs is for you to be your imperfectly perfect self more than anything else. 

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